Mara Jivanma Prakashnu Sthan

Here is a comprehensive summary in English of the provided Gujarati text from "Mara Jivanma Prakashnu Sthan" by Sukhlal Sanghavi:

This article, "The Place of 'Prakash' in My Life," written by Sukhlal Sanghavi, reflects on the significant, albeit initially indirect, influence of the Jain religious journal "Prakash" (meaning "Light") on his life, particularly during his formative years.

The author begins by stating that although he did not encounter "Prakash" in his youth, his introduction to it happened later in life. He notes that he hasn't read it consistently, nor does he possess old issues. His initial exposure was when a friend, who was a subscriber, used to read articles aloud from it.

Sanghavi's upbringing was within the Sthanakavasi tradition, a sect of Jainism. He was deeply immersed in the teachings and practices of Sthanakavasi monks and nuns from a young age, which instilled in him a devout belief that they were direct disciples of Lord Mahavir. He admits to overlooking any shortcomings in their conduct and accepting their teachings without question.

However, his life took a turn when "Prakash," a journal emanating from the Murtipujak (idol-worshipping) tradition, particularly associated with the Tapa Gachha, entered his life through a Murtipujak individual residing in his Sthanakavasi village. This was an unusual occurrence, as such journals were not typically found in Sthanakavasi communities. Through his friend who read "Prakash" articles, Sanghavi was exposed to diametrically opposing viewpoints.

"Prakash" discussed concepts like idol worship, pilgrimage, and various forms of ritualistic worship (Ashtaprakari, etc.) involving offerings like incense and flowers. It also referenced later Jain Agamas and commentaries (Panchangi) instead of the traditional thirty-two Agamas, and featured Sanskrit verses alongside Prakrit. The journal also discussed the practice of not covering one's mouth with a cloth (muhapati) and supported the wearing of yellow robes.

Initially, Sanghavi viewed these differing perspectives as mere falsehoods, a product of his ingrained Sthanakavasi beliefs. However, his friend's continued interest and his own latent curiosity compelled him to consider these opposing ideas. This created a conflict within him, leading to a dual set of ingrained beliefs.

The author describes his mind at that time as grappling with these conflicting influences, seeking a way forward. He recalls a period of mental upheaval between 1941 and 1943 (corresponding to Samvat 1997-1999). Despite having memorized numerous Sanskrit verses and thousands of Prakrit verses from his tradition, he found himself increasingly drawn to Sanskrit. This attraction began to weaken his inherited beliefs, but the fear of familial and spiritual elders, coupled with deep-seated traditionalism, prevented him from openly acting on his doubts. Nevertheless, even this limited exposure to "Prakash" began to reshape his thinking.

He started experiencing urges to visit temples with a critical eye and even to approach Sthanakavasi monks with a skeptical attitude. However, the strong influence of his ancestral traditions prevented him from freely exploring these thoughts. Reading new issues of "Prakash" further fueled his desire to learn about the fifteen Agamas, Sanskrit literature, grammar, and logic. He began to feel that adhering solely to the thirty-two Agamas and limited commentaries was insufficient. By 1943 (Samvat 1999), he felt a strong sense of rebellion against this limitation.

Around the same time, he read in "Prakash" about Muni Dharmavijayji Maharaj's journey to Kashi for Sanskrit studies. This news further stimulated his intellectually hungry mind and offered a ray of hope amidst his perceived "dark age" lifestyle. Ultimately, through various personal efforts, he joined Muni Dharmavijayji Maharaj in Kashi in 1944 (Samvat 2000).

Sanghavi states that this article is not the place to detail his autobiography from that point onwards, nor does he have the time. He believes that recounting his experiences of scholarly debates, contemplation, religious thought, social interactions, and the evolving perspectives from sectarian to societal to national and global views would be valuable for others to compare with their own experiences and learn from his journey.

However, his primary purpose in this piece is to highlight the specific place "Prakash" holds in his life. He acknowledges that the journal has undergone significant changes towards greater breadth and generosity after Shri Parmanand Kapadia's involvement. Despite these changes, he currently holds a reservation about the journal's intellectual depth and impartiality. He believes "Prakash" does not engage in rigorous, unbiased contemplation of even general religious principles, let alone Jainism.

However, he qualifies this by saying that his current assessment might be influenced by his own evolving intellectual journey, having moved beyond many narrow perspectives. He reflects on his past "dark age" self and recognizes that "Prakash," like a younger sibling, provided him with light and guidance in his confusion. He marvels at how something seemingly insignificant can become life-sustaining and nurturing.

The author notes the natural divergence that occurs over time between a restless mind that explores numerous philosophical, literary, and religious texts and a stable mind that thinks in a single direction. Yet, even with limited reading, some articles from "Prakash" remain vivid in his memory. He specifically mentions articles by Shri Anupchandbhai on Brahmacharya and other life-influencing topics, whose impact continues to inspire him.

He feels that even if "Prakash" originated from a sectarian and lineage-specific viewpoint, if it had fully embraced contemporary developments and methodologies, it would have experienced rejuvenation rather than decline. Just as a person who understands the art of living experiences renewed life with age rather than old age, a journal should also become stronger and fresher with time. Journals, like individuals, institutions, and religions, must embrace change in accordance with the evolving times. They must adopt a "spring-like" life of thought, study, and fearlessness to remain relevant and useful.

Sanghavi admits he is unaware of the current state of "Prakash" as he does not read it. He suggests that if it still engages in dry rituals, pronouncements, and one-sided religious doctrines, it should ideally adopt a more fitting name. He expresses hope that the journal will transform to embody the thoughtful and noble articles he has heard about. He reiterates that "Prakash" has been truly illuminating, having cast a valuable ray of light into his confined life and darkened emotions.

He looks forward to the journal's development and the activities it fosters, holding elevated hopes for it, much like one cherishes old companions of a father. He understands "Prakash" as the mouthpiece of a specific society that has contributed significantly to literary propagation through publishing numerous original works, translations, and summaries.

However, he emphasizes that times have changed. Alongside such literary propagation, the society should undertake serious, broad, and completely impartial Jain literary research. Free from the calculation of money and the allure of external grandeur, it should pursue pure literary devotion. To achieve this, the society must support specialized scholars and expand its library. By initiating activities catering to specialized scholars in addition to the general public, it can become a hub that attracts scholars from home and abroad. Bhavnagar, he adds, is also a conducive location for this. He believes that deep contemplation and struggle arising from this pursuit of knowledge will naturally transform "Prakash," moving it towards a universally accepted and inclusive form, shedding its sectarianism.